Building a family history together when you live far apart
Put it in one shared place online and let each relative add their own part. A family spread across countries holds its history in pieces. One cousin has the photographs, an aunt remembers the old house, a brother has the certificates. One shared record, where each adds what they know, works far better than one person gathering it all by email.
Why it usually falls to one person
In most families, one person becomes the family historian. They send emails asking for dates, wait for answers that never come, and keep everything on their own computer. When they stop, it stops. And the relatives who knew the most were often never asked, because they lived too far away to sit with.
What works
- One place, not many copies. A shared record everyone can open stops five versions of the tree drifting apart.
- Each tells their own part. The cousin in Australia knows her side better than anyone in Ireland does.
- Ask in small pieces. “What do you remember of Granny’s house?” gets an answer. “Can you send me everything you know?” does not.
- Talking, not just typing. Many older relatives would rather talk, and distance need not stop them.
- Each in their own language, where the family has spread that far.
Getting started
- One person starts the tree with what they know, however little.
- Invite the relatives who know most, usually the oldest, before anyone else.
- Ask each about their own branch. People remember their own parents and grandparents best.
- Say how sure each fact is, so that what an aunt remembers and what a certificate proves are never confused.
Be careful with the living
A family that has spread out includes people who barely know each other. A second cousin you have never met does not need your address or your date of birth. Shared does not have to mean seen by everyone.
One family record on Heirstory, wherever you live
Heirstory keeps one private record for the whole family, and each relative reaches it from wherever they are.
- Invite relatives by email. The link works for fourteen days, and each who joins sees the family from where they stand.
- Each talks with Gene, an AI genealogist, aloud or by typing, whenever it suits them. What they remember is kept beside the people it is about.
- Gene can pass a question on. If a relative who has joined would know the answer, Gene can ask them, once you say so. Their answer comes back to you.
- Each person decides what the rest see of them. Near family see each other in full; everyone else sees what each person chooses.
- English, French or German, whichever each reader chooses.
- A family can share credits in a pool, so the cost of research does not fall on one person.
Questions
Does everyone need to join?
No. One person can start, and others join when they are ready. People who have not joined are looked after by their closest relatives who have.
How do I get relatives far away to take part?
Ask one small, particular question rather than for everything they know. Send it to the relative most likely to know, and offer to talk it through on a call. Once one story is in, others often follow.
What if two branches disagree about a fact?
Both are kept, each with its source or in the relative’s own words. A record may settle it; if not, both stand.
Can a relative abroad use Heirstory in their own language?
Heirstory is in English, French and German, and each reader chooses their own.